Monday, October 20, 2008

Let me talk to my husband first?

Ok, so I am one of those people that thought I would never say "Let me talk to my husband first" but lately I am noticing I am that girl. It's so hard to agree to go and do things with friends nowdays without checking the husband/wife schedule. The other night a well meaning colleague asked me to attend "happy hour" and I was totally taken aback as to how I responded immediately with "Let me talk to Anthony about that." I think this is probably pretty normal to shift immediately into the responsible wife but I was astounded that it came so naturally and to be honest, felt a little bit lame.

I was always so sure that I would keep my fierce independence when I said vows and I would just "do as I wanted." Oh how marriage has schooled me! Anthony has never asked me to clear things with him nor have we even discussed this matter but somehow I had an engrained response that said "Erica, you must check with your husband regarding this matter." Now, I should note, there are things that I do not check with Anthony on. I do not ask Anthony to make coffee dates with friends on my own time. I do not check with him on what girls I befriend or even what I do while I am at school but when there is a chance that an event could break into married time...I seek counsel from my gorgeous husband.

Did anyone else experience this immediate need to be wifely and seek counsel? I really pray that someone understands me. Give me an Amen if you relate! :)



Casey said...

Haha! I have done this for a while, even when I wasn't married. I think it was because I lived with Justin before hand so it was kind of a scheduling thing more or less. I just never use the word "husband" so I dont sound so lame, lol!

Mommy to those Special Ks said...

I really think it's just a matter of common courtesy... for instance, when I was living with my mom as an adult, I would check with her, too, before making plans. It doesn't mean that he controls you or anything, it's just the polite thing to do, you know? I'm sure you expect the same from him... I know I expect it from Frank when he's home! :)