Monday, June 27, 2005

God Willing

Have you ever heard someone use the phrase "God Willing?" I have heard it used and it occurred to me that to be honest, everything is ..God willing! I was thinking about this today and how my life has changed drastically just in the last week to two weeks. At about that time I made a decision that I would whole-heartedly seek God's will..no matter how hard it was. My life has never been so peaceful. Nothing in my life has really changed or even taken shape but I know this, I have peace that passes ALL understanding.

I am a very sinful creature who does things that my carnal nature really wants. If I was to be honest with my blogging public, I want to have premarital sex, I want to overeat bad things, I want to be lazy, I want to lie around in my sin and wallow but something in me seeks God above all of these things. Sometimes I fall flat on my face and do things that I know are the worst for me. I accept calls that I know will drain me spiritually or emotionally, I talk about things that I don't want to talk about, watch or listen to things that fill me with poison and the list goes on. I hate the things that I do, say, think, or feel sometimes.

Today is a day of thinking about God and his will for my life. I know that if I just follow him and obey, my life will be as peaceful as I would like it to be. It's strange that as I seek my goals, dreams, aspirations, and desires that in the past, I have never thought about HIS will. Today, I dwelled in his presence for about an hour praying his will over your lives, my life, and our dreams and goals. I have felt peace the last week or two just because God has finally been in the driver's seat in my life.

I gave my heart to Jesus (FOR REAL) at the age of 16. I chose that day that I would be a "Christian" and from that day until quite recently I lived my life the same way...in Erica's will. At some juncture of this past couple of weeks, I have realized that my will...is really not right. It's HIS will that is perfect, glorious, fruitful, and mostly peaceful. I have longed for peace in my life from the time I was little and hearing about problems that no child should ever hear about. I have gained peace for the first time by allowing God to be my parent, my friend, my boyfriend, my counselor, and mostly my WILL. I love God's will and know it is finally the place that I want to reside.

Today, I challenge you to give your will up to God and just allow HIM to be the one who makes decisions. It says in the word that we are to be in constant prayer and I think this is what it is referring to. I think that we need to be praying God's will over each decision in our lives and seriously seek HIM in every endeavor. I say...let's do that...God Willing! :)

Happy Birthday to my friend Jason Rodriguez today! He's 25!!!!

~Erica~

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