Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Polygraph Shmolygraph

Yesterday I was watching a commercial for Goodrich service and there was a guy who worked for them hooked up to a polygraph. A customer came in and asked him questions about his service and he answered them truthfully as he was hooked up to this device. I was watching it and although it did have some comical value, it made me sad. We are a world that really does require a polygraph for just about everything. We require it to find out if our man is cheating and ask it on the Maury Povich show, we require it in court when we are trying to find out if someone is guilty, and we even require it when we are getting a job in the government.

This is really one of the saddest truths I came to last night. I went out last night and was walking in Balboa and talking to God as I usually do. I started to pray about my sin life. This is a usual occurence too since I am the queen of sin. (I admit it!) I began to pray about my dishonesty. I realized from that commercial that sometimes I live the lie so well, I forget what truth is. I think a lot of us have come to this point. I do know people who are honest and who are sometimes even brutally honest but even they, aren't the most honest people.

Really think about, when was the last time you let someone hear what you were really thinking about something? I am not saying we should all walk around with our most current feeling on a large sandwich board on our body. That isn't the idea. What I am suggesting is that it would be a better world if we all would be more authentic with who we really are. I have been trying to do this the past year, and let me tell you..it is NOT easy!

I am going to present a situation to you and you will find out just how authentic you are...if you are honest that is. You work for a great boss. She/He is strong, capable, intelligent, willing to budge, open to ideas, and caring about your personal feelings. You love working at your job. Slowly things at your job start to change. They are not getting worse, just different. Slowly your boss is asking you to pull a little extra weight but is not offering any extra compensation. You have always been treated with the upmost respect and that hasn't changed. There are more things that seem to be out of your job description but something in you allows it to happen and feels accomplished when the boss says "Good Job Joe" (Joe is your name)

It is getting harder to complete your job in the allotted hours due to the new responsibilities but again, you just feel like your boss trusts you. When you go home at night though you have a nagging feeling in you that you really should be getting paid more or the new responsibilities will have to stop. You brood about this for weeks and finally decide to talk to you very understanding boss. What do you say?

I am not going to give you a script of what you should say but I am guessing it will be less than authentic. Some people would handle this situation very effectively because they have strong boundaries in place. Some people would handle this situation horribly and go to the boss in anger yelling and screaming about how it's not fair. My bet is that the average, everyday, most of the time scenerio would involve the person taking it for some time and then finally saying something almost in jest about all of the new responsibilities never quite asking for a raise or a cut in those responsibilities. Isn't that sad?

Now, as I said, not everyone would handle this situation badly, but, there are situations like this every day where people are being walked on and mistreated not because anyone wants to but because they allow it. There are also situations where friendships are never real because you never get to know the person you are friends with. There are also great people who like grouchy because they never take the time to authentically share what is on their heart. Again, I am not a fan of complete disclosure but I think we could take a great step and work toward not needing that polygraph. As a matter of fact, I think we wouldn't have as much cheating to display on Maury, as much crime to put through the court systems, and overall not as many shady government workers. Let's get authentic!

Here is my learning and thankfulness for yesterday:

Learning March 28, 2005:

1. It stinks to not be able to contact a friend on their birthday. (Long story but it made me sad)

2. It is great to hear from a friend when you miss them and want them to call so much.

3. New challenges are frustrating but they can be so rewarding also.

4. My new boundaries are making me feel so much more comfortable.

5. My frustration level is getting out of hand and it's time to take a step back.

Thankfulness March 28, 2005:

I am thankful that Joel is back safely from Costa Rica. I am thankful that he called me and thought of me yesterday. I am thankful that he had a good day at his new job although it was challenging. I am thankful that he had a great time in Costa Rica and was able to see a lot of cool stuff. I am thankful that I will soon get time with him to celebrate his birthday with him and treat him to some gifts. I am mostly thankful that I get to share my life with my beautiful friend Joel. Thanks God for such a magnificent blessing and thank you Joel! :) Welcome home sweetheart!


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